I cannot believe that 2010 is over. It went so fast.
Random Highlights:
-the girls received electric razors (not the ones you shave with,ha ha) but the ones that are battery operated and can go 15 miles per hour. That is pretty fast. Mike has been riding his bike while they are on these apparatuses.
-I just burned pinto beans on the stove. My house really does not smell pretty like it did just 20 minutes ago. So...I whipped up some oatmeal cookies to bake in the oven. Maybe that will help mask the odor.
-Snickers the kitty got really good at sprinting up the Christmas tree and back down in record time. She only broke 1 wise man from the nativity scene and 4 ornaments. Not too bad considering she is a kitten and all.
-Baking oatmeal cookies did not help the odor. The weather is beautiful to open the windows and light some candles.
-We are about to go to my very favorite church service of the year. The prayer and healing service. I love to feel like we get to start over. A new year. I do not make new year's resolutions because they are hard to keep. But one thing I do want to set my heart on is to get to know Him better this year. The new Ray Vander Laan DVD and discovery guide lessons are about walking with God in the desert. Today's study started in Genesis 1. "In the beginning..." How appropriate. I just smiled. Thank you God for being with us in the details. That is one thing I learned in 2010. Over and over God was in the details--as He always is, but I was more aware of it.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
Fluffy Flamingo
Prior to the Christmas worship programs at church, Aunt Cindy buys the girls new outfits.
This year Lisa's was bought on the day of the performance just hours before it was to be worn.
We came home from school, and there it was in all it's pink glory.
Now--Lisa's favorite color's are blue and green, not pink.
She looked at it and was thankful, but....it was pink.
She said "It's cute, but I will look like a fluffy flamingo."
The End.
This year Lisa's was bought on the day of the performance just hours before it was to be worn.
We came home from school, and there it was in all it's pink glory.
Now--Lisa's favorite color's are blue and green, not pink.
She looked at it and was thankful, but....it was pink.
She said "It's cute, but I will look like a fluffy flamingo."
The End.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Small Group Christmas Fun
We had our small group over Saturday night for a fellowship/welcome Brandon home from Iraq/potluck dinner. It was so much fun to get together with everybody and also added a few "new" friends to our small group.
We will be starting a new study in January based on the book "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. Under the title it has written: "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"
Hmmm. Very interesting. How many times do I want to be happy and holiness is the furthest thing on my mind or it may be on my mind, but it sure is not in my actions?
A quote from the book: "Sacred Marriage doesn't tell how to build a better marriage--it shows how your marriage can help you deepen your relationship with God...everything about your marriage is filled with the potential for discovering and revealing Christ's character."
Hmmm. Very interesting. I get lots of opportunity to discover and to reveal Christ's character, but a lot of times I fail miserably and have to humble myself and keep on learning and growing. I love this book and highly recommend it and cannot wait for our small group to start discussing it.
Unfortunately, I did not take any pictures of all of the fun we had. Or of all of the kids that were here. Or of all of the food that was brought over. Or the overwhelmed kitten who found great comfort in Crystal's arms.
Here is a picture of the new kitty "Snickers" in the Christmas tree.
She discovered she could climb.
She discovered that she can play with ornaments from inside the tree.
She didn't know she could do this the first week the tree was up, so I thought (rather naively I suppose) that maybe she didn't like trees inside the house and would not really take any interest in it.
Will the Christmas tree survive this season?
We will be starting a new study in January based on the book "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. Under the title it has written: "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"
Hmmm. Very interesting. How many times do I want to be happy and holiness is the furthest thing on my mind or it may be on my mind, but it sure is not in my actions?
A quote from the book: "Sacred Marriage doesn't tell how to build a better marriage--it shows how your marriage can help you deepen your relationship with God...everything about your marriage is filled with the potential for discovering and revealing Christ's character."
Hmmm. Very interesting. I get lots of opportunity to discover and to reveal Christ's character, but a lot of times I fail miserably and have to humble myself and keep on learning and growing. I love this book and highly recommend it and cannot wait for our small group to start discussing it.
Unfortunately, I did not take any pictures of all of the fun we had. Or of all of the kids that were here. Or of all of the food that was brought over. Or the overwhelmed kitten who found great comfort in Crystal's arms.
Here is a picture of the new kitty "Snickers" in the Christmas tree.She discovered she could climb.
She discovered that she can play with ornaments from inside the tree.
She didn't know she could do this the first week the tree was up, so I thought (rather naively I suppose) that maybe she didn't like trees inside the house and would not really take any interest in it.
Will the Christmas tree survive this season?
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Song for Christmas: A Baby Changes Everything
Today at church Rachel, Heartsong and the praise team sang this Faith Hill song. It was beautiful. So we came home and I found the video they showed at church. This has a fellow singing it. But the meaning is all the same. Jesus came as a baby and changed everything.
Thank you Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6)
Thank you Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6)
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Fun at Seaworld
We went to Seaworld over the Thanksgiving break to see the decorations and let Mike, Lisa and Katie ride a few rides.
You cannot really see--but that is Mike and Katie finishing on the Great White. I am not a roller coaster fan and Lisa was not a fan of this ride. It has a pretty steep drop--it gives me palpitations just looking at it. Lisa did ride the Steel Eel with Mike and Katie and LOVED it. Again--I am not a fan of leaving the perfectly fine ground and twirling around on a piece of metal that has the potential to at the very least leave me dizzy for the rest of the week and at the most die:-)
4-D Polar Express
This is more my style!
Thanksgiving 2010
Give Thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever. 1 Chronicles 16:34
Dad went up to D'Hanis and got Grandmother Wells on Wednesday afternoon.
On Thursday morning Mike put the turkey in the smoker and all of the cooking started. We went to church at 10:00 and came home to continue cooking and preparing for the carbohydate festival that was to ensue.
All of the work--cooking, cleaning--it is all fun, then we sit at the table, pray and in 15 minutes it is over. I wanted to say "Everybody sit. Stay."
These are the beautiful flowers that Cindy sent me this year. It made a lovely centerpiece for our Thanksgiving table.
Dad, Brian, Cindy, Mike, Grandmother, Katie and Lisa. Later Javier and his son, Christian, came over. The football games were on, Cindy and I walked 3 miles and Lisa and Katie were playing with the new addition to our home: Snickers.
I really need to get a better picture of this little kitten. She is cute and quiet. At night we put her in the bathroom and she does not meow at all.
The girls absolutely adore her.
Dad went up to D'Hanis and got Grandmother Wells on Wednesday afternoon.
On Thursday morning Mike put the turkey in the smoker and all of the cooking started. We went to church at 10:00 and came home to continue cooking and preparing for the carbohydate festival that was to ensue.
All of the work--cooking, cleaning--it is all fun, then we sit at the table, pray and in 15 minutes it is over. I wanted to say "Everybody sit. Stay."
These are the beautiful flowers that Cindy sent me this year. It made a lovely centerpiece for our Thanksgiving table.
Dad, Brian, Cindy, Mike, Grandmother, Katie and Lisa. Later Javier and his son, Christian, came over. The football games were on, Cindy and I walked 3 miles and Lisa and Katie were playing with the new addition to our home: Snickers.
I really need to get a better picture of this little kitten. She is cute and quiet. At night we put her in the bathroom and she does not meow at all.
The girls absolutely adore her.
On Friday I drove Grandmother back home. No black Friday shopping here. We got our tree down and started decoratating. The weather turned cooler too, which really helps to get one in the Christmas spirit.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Learning
This really spoke to me today.
This is the first time in my nursing career that I have no idea what I will be doing next. It is a little scary.
I have been learning to trust in God. To trust that He is in control and that He knows what my next job is.
I have been learning that my identity is not in my career or my marriage or my parenting, but my identity is in Christ.
I have been learning that taking a break from work can open up emotions that need to be dealt with. Namely, I have a great fear of getting dementia and dying at a young age like my mom did. I went to the doctor yesterday and he drew a whole bunch of labs and started me on a super B complex vitamin and Lexapro. I feel like I have been losing my memory lately and have been so tired, but not depressed. With all that said, my doctor thinks that it is "readjustment disorder." A normal time someone goes through after losing a loved one. Mine has just taken a year to get to me. It takes from 1-5 years, so the doctor says.
I have been learning...and will keep learning and praying and trusting.
*The Lexapro did not work for me. So I am going the natural route with amino acids and vitamins. I think that it is working. Of course lots of prayer and memorizing scripture and trusting God.
This is the first time in my nursing career that I have no idea what I will be doing next. It is a little scary.
I have been learning to trust in God. To trust that He is in control and that He knows what my next job is.
I have been learning that my identity is not in my career or my marriage or my parenting, but my identity is in Christ.
I have been learning that taking a break from work can open up emotions that need to be dealt with. Namely, I have a great fear of getting dementia and dying at a young age like my mom did. I went to the doctor yesterday and he drew a whole bunch of labs and started me on a super B complex vitamin and Lexapro. I feel like I have been losing my memory lately and have been so tired, but not depressed. With all that said, my doctor thinks that it is "readjustment disorder." A normal time someone goes through after losing a loved one. Mine has just taken a year to get to me. It takes from 1-5 years, so the doctor says.
I have been learning...and will keep learning and praying and trusting.
*The Lexapro did not work for me. So I am going the natural route with amino acids and vitamins. I think that it is working. Of course lots of prayer and memorizing scripture and trusting God.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Race Day
Cindy and I did the relay and it was so much fun. I enjoyed this so much.
I did the first leg which was 7.7 miles. Mile one had a 6 minute "break" for a passing train. There were some very unhappy runners. I left in coral 3 which are the fast runners. They are seriously into running. That being said, I ran my first mile in 9 minutes 30 seconds. So I had to s-l-o-w down. A good mile run for me is a pace of 10:30.
I ran it in 1 hour 25 minutes without any bathroom breaks. That is really good for me AND...I am not wiped out right now.
Cindy ran 5.4 miles in a little over an hour and did a great job. Brian dropped us off and picked us up without any difficulties.
The shirts we chose to wear for the race are from a group called Team 413 with the bible verse from Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Day before race day
Today Cindy and I took the girls and headed to the Alamodome to get our race packs for tomorrow's race. We are running the relay. I was so thrilled to get the packet and the cute little baton which is actually a drum stick. It is light and can fit down the back of your sports bra if you are so inclined to put it there. I may. Or I may not.
I will take the first leg of the race and to tell the truth, I do not feel ready. I am bloated and do not feel energetic. The last part could be because I sat in the hot tub with Mike and have taken a melatonin to get a good nights sleep.
While at the expo, Cindy and I got a chance to shop a little and to laugh a lot. At one point I am on my cell phone with Melody and Cindy is mouthing to me "What did I do with my phone?" I look to make sure I am not using her phone and see that she has something that looks suspiciously like a cell phone in her hand, her cell phone. Yes, she was holding it asking where it was. We laughed so hard. It is typical what happens to us at least one time when we are together. :-)
Lisa and Katie were very playful with each other today (to the point of picking on each other) and this evening Lisa came up and said, "Katie is really getting on top of my fingernails today." I am pretty sure she meant that Katie was getting under her skin today. :-)
Yesterday the girls were playing outside and Katie went to rest. Lisa said "Katie come back and play." Katie replied, "I have some bodily aches right now Lisa." :-)
Cindy, Melody, Lisa and Katie
Thursday, November 11, 2010
A special service
November 7 was mom's one year heavenly birthday. I cannot believe how fast this year has gone. It seems just like yesterday we were sitting at her bedside, laughing, talking, praying.
Mike was on team for the Men's STARS retreat again this year. Dad went, Gary Williams went, among a couple of other close friends. If you have never been on a retreat before, then I ask that you do not read any further.
Mom died last year on the day of Candlelight service for the men's retreat. It was incredibly special to think that she received the ultimate Candlelight service on that day and I will forever be touched by this service. This year we had Grandmother Wells there for dad, Cindy came, Mike was there, Lisa and Katie of course. Sheila came for Gary, Rhonda came for her husband Don, Crystal came for her husband John. Plus, my church family. The people I love the most in the world were there. It was such a gift from God.
I have much more to talk about...I am not working right now, our other house has a contract on it (praise the Lord) and how big Lisa and Katie are getting. But it will have to wait for another time. Getting ready to go on a date with Mike--yeah!! And the relay 1/2 marathon is this Sunday. Lots going on.
Mike was on team for the Men's STARS retreat again this year. Dad went, Gary Williams went, among a couple of other close friends. If you have never been on a retreat before, then I ask that you do not read any further.
Mom died last year on the day of Candlelight service for the men's retreat. It was incredibly special to think that she received the ultimate Candlelight service on that day and I will forever be touched by this service. This year we had Grandmother Wells there for dad, Cindy came, Mike was there, Lisa and Katie of course. Sheila came for Gary, Rhonda came for her husband Don, Crystal came for her husband John. Plus, my church family. The people I love the most in the world were there. It was such a gift from God.
I have much more to talk about...I am not working right now, our other house has a contract on it (praise the Lord) and how big Lisa and Katie are getting. But it will have to wait for another time. Getting ready to go on a date with Mike--yeah!! And the relay 1/2 marathon is this Sunday. Lots going on.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Catch up
I cannot believe that October is almost over.
It has been a very busy month.
October 4 was dad's birthday. He is going on the men's STARS retreat the first weekend of November (it is the opening of deer season--but he is still going--reluctantly).
October 6 was Mike's 43rd birthday. In the new bible (NASB Greek/Hebrew Study Bible) I gave him I put for his 44th birthday. I guess I am a year ahead of myself:-) Not that he looks older that 43!! Because he doesn't. Really. He looks no older than 40. I better keep going.
October 8 Pastor Jaeger passed away. He was my patient. I wanted to quit doing hospice prior to him coming onto our hospice services. He was discharged from Vitas and still met the criteria for hospice under another diagnosis, so we took him and I became his nurse. I didn't want to quit while he was still with us. I didn't think it would be as hard as it was, but I became really hard on myself. As he deteriorated in condition I would question my nursing skills. My head knowledge told me everything was going the way it was supposed to, but my heart was not. They were too close. It was almost like taking care of family.
October 14-17 was the women's STARS retreat. I was on team again and got to be the nurse and a table leader. It was an incredibly busy time, but at least I didn't have to spend the night in the ER like the last retreat. However, we did have a lot of issues needing medical attention. I felt like a nurse the entire retreat. I was even calling them my patients instead of retreatants. It was fun to serve again and I did get a couple of moments that were appointments by God. One was with my friend Crystal and the other was my friend Scarlet's (who passed away in June) mother-in-law, Yvonne. God is in the details.
October 18 was Katie's birthday. My little 9 year old. She got a new little fish aquarium for her room and her beta fish "Lucky" proceeded to die in it 2 days later. He was named "Lucky" because Katie got him from Wal-Mart. She saved his little life because Wal-Mart really does not care about the "pet" department. Note to self: Do not get anymore fish from Wal-Mart.
October 21 was our 13th wedding anniversary. We have not done anything special for it yet, but I am so thankful for another year with this man (who is 43 not 44). Pastor and Mrs Jaeger celebrated their 61st wedding anniversary in June and it was so impressed upon my heart and so special. I told Mike that we have 13 down, 48 to go!!
I am training for the relay half marathon. I will run 7.7 miles and Cindy is going to run 5.4 miles. Maybe "run" is a bit of an exaggeration. Perhaps jog would be a better word. Walk-really-fast maybe?? Really I have been training. My goal is to run my part in 1 hour 15 minutes at the most.
My last day at this hospice job is October 28. That is this coming Thursday. I do not have another job lined up at this point. I felt peace about our decision when I gave my notice. Funny thing is our friend Gary Williams had given his notice at the funeral home he was working at for the same day, October 28. I think God wanted me in hospice for a season. I don't know where He wants me now. But I plan to slow down, be still and wait for God to lead me. I pray I do not get worried and anxious but to have clear understanding where I am to be.
It has been a very busy month.
October 4 was dad's birthday. He is going on the men's STARS retreat the first weekend of November (it is the opening of deer season--but he is still going--reluctantly).
October 6 was Mike's 43rd birthday. In the new bible (NASB Greek/Hebrew Study Bible) I gave him I put for his 44th birthday. I guess I am a year ahead of myself:-) Not that he looks older that 43!! Because he doesn't. Really. He looks no older than 40. I better keep going.
October 8 Pastor Jaeger passed away. He was my patient. I wanted to quit doing hospice prior to him coming onto our hospice services. He was discharged from Vitas and still met the criteria for hospice under another diagnosis, so we took him and I became his nurse. I didn't want to quit while he was still with us. I didn't think it would be as hard as it was, but I became really hard on myself. As he deteriorated in condition I would question my nursing skills. My head knowledge told me everything was going the way it was supposed to, but my heart was not. They were too close. It was almost like taking care of family.
October 14-17 was the women's STARS retreat. I was on team again and got to be the nurse and a table leader. It was an incredibly busy time, but at least I didn't have to spend the night in the ER like the last retreat. However, we did have a lot of issues needing medical attention. I felt like a nurse the entire retreat. I was even calling them my patients instead of retreatants. It was fun to serve again and I did get a couple of moments that were appointments by God. One was with my friend Crystal and the other was my friend Scarlet's (who passed away in June) mother-in-law, Yvonne. God is in the details.
October 18 was Katie's birthday. My little 9 year old. She got a new little fish aquarium for her room and her beta fish "Lucky" proceeded to die in it 2 days later. He was named "Lucky" because Katie got him from Wal-Mart. She saved his little life because Wal-Mart really does not care about the "pet" department. Note to self: Do not get anymore fish from Wal-Mart.
October 21 was our 13th wedding anniversary. We have not done anything special for it yet, but I am so thankful for another year with this man (who is 43 not 44). Pastor and Mrs Jaeger celebrated their 61st wedding anniversary in June and it was so impressed upon my heart and so special. I told Mike that we have 13 down, 48 to go!!
I am training for the relay half marathon. I will run 7.7 miles and Cindy is going to run 5.4 miles. Maybe "run" is a bit of an exaggeration. Perhaps jog would be a better word. Walk-really-fast maybe?? Really I have been training. My goal is to run my part in 1 hour 15 minutes at the most.
My last day at this hospice job is October 28. That is this coming Thursday. I do not have another job lined up at this point. I felt peace about our decision when I gave my notice. Funny thing is our friend Gary Williams had given his notice at the funeral home he was working at for the same day, October 28. I think God wanted me in hospice for a season. I don't know where He wants me now. But I plan to slow down, be still and wait for God to lead me. I pray I do not get worried and anxious but to have clear understanding where I am to be.
Friday, September 3, 2010
September Already
I cannot believe how fast time is going this year. School is now in full swing. BSF starts very soon and I will be a group leader in October after the STARS retreat.
Lisa has started 4th grade with Mrs. Moody. Mrs Moody was also Cindy's 4th grade teacher many, many years ago. It is really neat to think that Cindy and Lisa had the same teacher!
Katie is in the 3rd grade and has Mrs. Fincke. We already love and adore her from last year.
I am still doing hospice. I am going through a tough time right now. I love the philosophy of hospice, I am just not too sure I like to company I am working for. The communication is poor and I find myself stressed out more than I should be. I like most of the nurses I work with and I really respect our medical director. I am very fond of my patients...some of the family members are very selfish. A couple of the families want the family member to die so they can sell their stuff and get money. It just makes my heart sick.
Mike is still with Gentiva. He absolutely loves his job. He is very good at what he does. His patients love him. He gives safe patient care and is so competent at what he does.
Sometimes I think of when we go to heaven and everything will be perfect. No more need for doctors, nurses, police officers, lawyers. What a world that will be.
I have thought about what I want to do in heaven:
*worship God by playing the piano fluently
*worship God by gardening
*worship God by cooking for the banquet
*worship God singing with a beautiful voice
*worship God by dancing like a ballerina
Lisa has started 4th grade with Mrs. Moody. Mrs Moody was also Cindy's 4th grade teacher many, many years ago. It is really neat to think that Cindy and Lisa had the same teacher!
Katie is in the 3rd grade and has Mrs. Fincke. We already love and adore her from last year.
I am still doing hospice. I am going through a tough time right now. I love the philosophy of hospice, I am just not too sure I like to company I am working for. The communication is poor and I find myself stressed out more than I should be. I like most of the nurses I work with and I really respect our medical director. I am very fond of my patients...some of the family members are very selfish. A couple of the families want the family member to die so they can sell their stuff and get money. It just makes my heart sick.
Mike is still with Gentiva. He absolutely loves his job. He is very good at what he does. His patients love him. He gives safe patient care and is so competent at what he does.
Sometimes I think of when we go to heaven and everything will be perfect. No more need for doctors, nurses, police officers, lawyers. What a world that will be.
I have thought about what I want to do in heaven:
*worship God by playing the piano fluently
*worship God by gardening
*worship God by cooking for the banquet
*worship God singing with a beautiful voice
*worship God by dancing like a ballerina
Saturday, August 21, 2010
My Wedding Dress
My sweet friend Sheila Williams is doing something so touching and special, that maybe one day I will do it too. She just started this over the summer with her daughter-in-law. They knit baby blankets for the babies in the NICU. They are called Kangaroo Blankets. It is so the baby and the mom/dad can have skin to skin contact. The babies seem to respond and get better faster.
Another neat ministry she is doing, called Threads of Love, is much more heart wrenching. It is to sew outfits for the tiny pre-mature babies who die. Many of them do not fit into anything for their burial. She told me that women donate their wedding dresses for the cause. So that is what I did. I did not get my wedding dress heir loomed like most do. It was tucked away in my closet. It was fun to try it on one last time--there were no photos for this!! I am not the size I was back then, but at least I could get it zipped.
It was fun to let the girls put it on. They had a blast.
Here is Katie in her momma's wedding dress.
And here is Lisa.
It was so much fun to see my girls wearing my dress.
I bought that dress for $200.00 at Bride's Mart back in 1997. It is a cream-colored dress that was perfect for an island wedding. It fit almost perfectly except the length. The funny thing is that when I went to put it on for our wedding, it still had that "do not steal from the store" alarm thingy in it. I wonder if the lady who altered my dress thought I stole it.
Our wedding was anything but perfect, and so has been our marriage. God has performed mighty miracles in our lives and I am so thankful for this man whom God gave to be my husband.
Mike and I on our wedding day (we look so young--I was 25 and Mike was 29)
October 21, 1997
St Thomas, USVI.
This is my very favorite picture from our wedding.
It was not hard to want to donate my dress. My prayer for Lisa and Katie is that they get to wear white dresses for their wedding, that they do not conform to the world or follow their "hearts". That they remain pure until their wedding night.
Create in them a pure heart, O God, and let that purity of heart be shown in their actions. (Psalm 51:10)
Another neat ministry she is doing, called Threads of Love, is much more heart wrenching. It is to sew outfits for the tiny pre-mature babies who die. Many of them do not fit into anything for their burial. She told me that women donate their wedding dresses for the cause. So that is what I did. I did not get my wedding dress heir loomed like most do. It was tucked away in my closet. It was fun to try it on one last time--there were no photos for this!! I am not the size I was back then, but at least I could get it zipped.
It was fun to let the girls put it on. They had a blast.
Here is Katie in her momma's wedding dress.
And here is Lisa.
It was so much fun to see my girls wearing my dress.
I bought that dress for $200.00 at Bride's Mart back in 1997. It is a cream-colored dress that was perfect for an island wedding. It fit almost perfectly except the length. The funny thing is that when I went to put it on for our wedding, it still had that "do not steal from the store" alarm thingy in it. I wonder if the lady who altered my dress thought I stole it.
Our wedding was anything but perfect, and so has been our marriage. God has performed mighty miracles in our lives and I am so thankful for this man whom God gave to be my husband.
Mike and I on our wedding day (we look so young--I was 25 and Mike was 29)
October 21, 1997
St Thomas, USVI.
This is my very favorite picture from our wedding.
It was not hard to want to donate my dress. My prayer for Lisa and Katie is that they get to wear white dresses for their wedding, that they do not conform to the world or follow their "hearts". That they remain pure until their wedding night.
Create in them a pure heart, O God, and let that purity of heart be shown in their actions. (Psalm 51:10)
Jury Duty and a good book
On Monday I had to go fulfill my civic duty. Of course I really didn't WANT to, but after getting there, it was not so bad.
I was potential juror #15. It was in civil court over a custody battle between a mother and a father who both claimed to love their elementary age boys. Neither parent had major issues, one may have had a bout with depression and the other was wealthy. The attorney asked me my opinion after hearing everybody else give theirs. I thought how selfish this mom and dad were being. I essentially said that and needless to say, they did not pick me.
I lost my parking ticket while fulfilling my civic duty and had to fork over $16. I could not believe that. I would have only had to pay $8 for all day parking. I know I lost it when I had to empty my pockets to get into the justice center. I cried. I just did. Crying did not make me feel any better, and knowing I get $6 for the day did not help. It is robbery--I bet the parking lot attendant makes minimum wage, plus it is not like the whole parking lot was empty (or full). The person/people/city are making money on parking. To have to pay DOUBLE--that is insane.
OK, enough of that.
I am reading a wonderful book by the president of World Vision called "The Hole in our Gospel." I am only half way through, but it is humbling and inspiring. Richard Stearns talks about his own journey from a corporate CEO to the CEO of World Vision. He talks about how in America we have a shallow and diminished view of the world and poverty and advancing the kingdom of God. That is so true, as I sit here behind a computer in an air conditioned home with running water and electricity and a refrigerator full of food and a closet full of clothes.
I think it is going to boil down to this- obedience to God. After all, is not obeying God the way to tell if we really know God?
Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did. 1 John 2:6
We do sponsor 2 little girls in Honduras through World Vision, help the homeless here in San Antonio, and also do "microfinancing" through Kiva, but it is not enough and we can do more.
Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little." 2 Corinthians 8:13-15
There is a quote from John MacArthur in this book: "The true gospel is a call to self-denial. It is not a call to self-fulfillment."
I was potential juror #15. It was in civil court over a custody battle between a mother and a father who both claimed to love their elementary age boys. Neither parent had major issues, one may have had a bout with depression and the other was wealthy. The attorney asked me my opinion after hearing everybody else give theirs. I thought how selfish this mom and dad were being. I essentially said that and needless to say, they did not pick me.
I lost my parking ticket while fulfilling my civic duty and had to fork over $16. I could not believe that. I would have only had to pay $8 for all day parking. I know I lost it when I had to empty my pockets to get into the justice center. I cried. I just did. Crying did not make me feel any better, and knowing I get $6 for the day did not help. It is robbery--I bet the parking lot attendant makes minimum wage, plus it is not like the whole parking lot was empty (or full). The person/people/city are making money on parking. To have to pay DOUBLE--that is insane.
OK, enough of that.
I am reading a wonderful book by the president of World Vision called "The Hole in our Gospel." I am only half way through, but it is humbling and inspiring. Richard Stearns talks about his own journey from a corporate CEO to the CEO of World Vision. He talks about how in America we have a shallow and diminished view of the world and poverty and advancing the kingdom of God. That is so true, as I sit here behind a computer in an air conditioned home with running water and electricity and a refrigerator full of food and a closet full of clothes.
I think it is going to boil down to this- obedience to God. After all, is not obeying God the way to tell if we really know God?
Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did. 1 John 2:6
We do sponsor 2 little girls in Honduras through World Vision, help the homeless here in San Antonio, and also do "microfinancing" through Kiva, but it is not enough and we can do more.
Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little." 2 Corinthians 8:13-15
There is a quote from John MacArthur in this book: "The true gospel is a call to self-denial. It is not a call to self-fulfillment."
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Learning about God's faithfulness
The summer has gone by so fast. Tomorrow we go get registered for school. It already starts in two weeks.
Today we came home from our "one last hoo-rah" before school starts.
We went to the coast for a short get-away. It could've been shorter as far as I am concerned. It started with a stinky RV--whoever used it last didn't empty the sewer line, so Mike came to the rescue and emptied it at 1:00 in the morning (my hero). I don't know if that had anything to do with the roaches in there this time. I HATE roaches. Can't stand the little suckers. They freak me out. Then the flip flops I wore rubbed my feet the wrong way and I had two sores on the tops of my feet. Good times.
But I must say, the beach was clean and the girls had a blast. Yesterday I got a free coffee from the restaurant we got our food to go from. That is always fun. The air conditioner was working in the RV. We are home now and that is good.
This morning I got to have my quiet time on the beach and God really showed me how faithful He has been in my life. The song on Pandora was "It is Well With My Soul" and I turned in my journal to two years ago in August when we had mom at the coast with us. That is when she fell and fractured her hip and everything seemed to go downhill from there.
In light of the uncertainty and moments of wondering if we were doing the right thing, God was there carrying me through those times. He was reaching for Cindy, He was showing me how to love my mom in her state of dementia, He was teaching me patience with Lisa and Katie and mom. He was showing me what kind of husband He has given me. Most important, that He loved my mom.
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8
Today we came home from our "one last hoo-rah" before school starts.
We went to the coast for a short get-away. It could've been shorter as far as I am concerned. It started with a stinky RV--whoever used it last didn't empty the sewer line, so Mike came to the rescue and emptied it at 1:00 in the morning (my hero). I don't know if that had anything to do with the roaches in there this time. I HATE roaches. Can't stand the little suckers. They freak me out. Then the flip flops I wore rubbed my feet the wrong way and I had two sores on the tops of my feet. Good times.
But I must say, the beach was clean and the girls had a blast. Yesterday I got a free coffee from the restaurant we got our food to go from. That is always fun. The air conditioner was working in the RV. We are home now and that is good.
This morning I got to have my quiet time on the beach and God really showed me how faithful He has been in my life. The song on Pandora was "It is Well With My Soul" and I turned in my journal to two years ago in August when we had mom at the coast with us. That is when she fell and fractured her hip and everything seemed to go downhill from there.
In light of the uncertainty and moments of wondering if we were doing the right thing, God was there carrying me through those times. He was reaching for Cindy, He was showing me how to love my mom in her state of dementia, He was teaching me patience with Lisa and Katie and mom. He was showing me what kind of husband He has given me. Most important, that He loved my mom.
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Painting Project
We moved into our home over 1 1/2 years ago and the walls were very neutral. I stared at them for a long time...thinking...pondering...wondering...what color should they be?
I didn't take any "before" shots because I forgot. The paint went on sale and I was soooo excited. I told Mike that I think one of my love languages is paint. Well, it is for the first day but by the third day I am not putting the words "love" and "paint" in the same sentence. Especially because I had two little helpers embarking on their first "paint their own room" experience. Suffice to say, it took a little longer and the clean-up was a bit more with the help. But we made it through without any scares for life. Only some paint in the grout.
These little bears are Lisa's are projects from 1st and 2nd grade. She loves art and has some of her projects hanging in her room, which we painted "Aqua Spray." It fits her personality with swimming and all. We had to go into major negotiations on the color for her room. It turned out really nice.
The soft pink room is Katie's. It looks very girly and delicate, nothing like Katie--and I mean that in the best way. She has her first soccer trophy on her shelf, she like to run barefoot in the dirt (eww, I can't stand for my feet to be dirty), she likes to climb trees and catch worms and crickets for the turtle. She loves her room.
Our room is harvest brown. I love how it turned out.
I really do like to paint.
Next up are the hallways. I think the living room, dining room and kitchen will have to wait another 1 1/2 years while I ponder on them for a while.
I didn't take any "before" shots because I forgot. The paint went on sale and I was soooo excited. I told Mike that I think one of my love languages is paint. Well, it is for the first day but by the third day I am not putting the words "love" and "paint" in the same sentence. Especially because I had two little helpers embarking on their first "paint their own room" experience. Suffice to say, it took a little longer and the clean-up was a bit more with the help. But we made it through without any scares for life. Only some paint in the grout.
These little bears are Lisa's are projects from 1st and 2nd grade. She loves art and has some of her projects hanging in her room, which we painted "Aqua Spray." It fits her personality with swimming and all. We had to go into major negotiations on the color for her room. It turned out really nice.
The soft pink room is Katie's. It looks very girly and delicate, nothing like Katie--and I mean that in the best way. She has her first soccer trophy on her shelf, she like to run barefoot in the dirt (eww, I can't stand for my feet to be dirty), she likes to climb trees and catch worms and crickets for the turtle. She loves her room.
Our room is harvest brown. I love how it turned out.
I really do like to paint.
Next up are the hallways. I think the living room, dining room and kitchen will have to wait another 1 1/2 years while I ponder on them for a while.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Random Pictures from Mike's phone
Summer blast. Sydney, Lisa and Katie.
Lisa at her first swim meet.
Lisa sliding off the slide at Heather and Bob's house. They are hosting our small group for the summer. We are studying 1 Thessalonians.
Katie and "Blue". One of my cousin Melissa's Great Daines in D'Hanis. Those dogs are TALL. They are also so sweet.
Lisa turning in her swimming race.
Mike and I got to go on a date. Guess where? I thought this picture was hilarious.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Happy Father's Day
Katie calls her daddy "Big D". I think that is so cute. Sometimes she calls him "daddy-o". Equally cute. She will sometimes call me "big mama". I think of a diner and a skillet when she calls me that.
Lisa calls her daddy "dad". And that is good. Lisa loves her dad and especially loves to go to Home Depot or Lowe's with him. She will drop EVERYTHING and go.
Lisa calls her daddy "dad". And that is good. Lisa loves her dad and especially loves to go to Home Depot or Lowe's with him. She will drop EVERYTHING and go.
Both girls love to watch movies and pop air popcorn with their daddy. They like to spend time with him at the beach, at home, at the pool. They adore him and he adores them, even when they are talking non-stop.
I am just in awe of this man that God has given me. What God has done is nothing short of a miracle and I will live the rest of my days praising Him for this gift.
Mike's shirt says "I'm not the man I ought to be, but, thank God I'm not the man I used to be."
Philippians 1:6 Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Mighty to Save
Tonight Mike and I watched a Loui Giglio video called Fruitcake and Ice Cream. The topic is on friendship and grace.
Part of the story was about a college senior who was balancing a party life with completing college. She was not a Christian, her boyfriend lived in an apartment with her and then cheated on her. She kicked him out and got another room mate who happened to be a Christian. Now this Christian girl did not judge, she listened and she prayed.
Eventually, after much boyfriend drama, this party girl wanted what this Christian girl had. Part of the story, and the story is much deeper, is that when she heard the song Mighty to Save the first time, it made her cry, she wondered why everyone raised their hands.
I needed to read the lyrics again, like I was listening for the first time.
Everyone needs compassion,
Love that's never failing;
Let mercy fall on me.
Everyone needs forgiveness,
The kindness of a Saviour;
The Hope of nations.
Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.
So take me as You find me,
All my fears and failures,
Fill my life again.
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in,
Now I surrender.
Shine your light and let the whole world see,
We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus
This party girl would journal and in her journal called her room mate a fruitcake and that is why part of the title is Fruitcake and Ice Cream.
This story does not end here. The party girl gave her life to Christ, journaled about it, about her changed life, e-mailed Loui Giglio, he responded and she thought it was crazy awesome that he would e-mail her back.
Three months later she died in a car accident. She was only 22 about to graduate from college.
Wow. It has made me think so much this evening.
We don't know how long we have on this side of heaven.
We don't know what our witness does for others.
Lord, I pray that I don't come across judgemental towards others, but loving. Let me not care what others think of me, if they think I am a fruitcake, let if be a fruitcake for you.
So take me as you find me, all my fears and failures, fill my life again. I give my life to follow, everything I believe in, now I surrender...
Part of the story was about a college senior who was balancing a party life with completing college. She was not a Christian, her boyfriend lived in an apartment with her and then cheated on her. She kicked him out and got another room mate who happened to be a Christian. Now this Christian girl did not judge, she listened and she prayed.
Eventually, after much boyfriend drama, this party girl wanted what this Christian girl had. Part of the story, and the story is much deeper, is that when she heard the song Mighty to Save the first time, it made her cry, she wondered why everyone raised their hands.
I needed to read the lyrics again, like I was listening for the first time.
Everyone needs compassion,
Love that's never failing;
Let mercy fall on me.
Everyone needs forgiveness,
The kindness of a Saviour;
The Hope of nations.
Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.
So take me as You find me,
All my fears and failures,
Fill my life again.
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in,
Now I surrender.
Shine your light and let the whole world see,
We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus
This party girl would journal and in her journal called her room mate a fruitcake and that is why part of the title is Fruitcake and Ice Cream.
This story does not end here. The party girl gave her life to Christ, journaled about it, about her changed life, e-mailed Loui Giglio, he responded and she thought it was crazy awesome that he would e-mail her back.
Three months later she died in a car accident. She was only 22 about to graduate from college.
Wow. It has made me think so much this evening.
We don't know how long we have on this side of heaven.
We don't know what our witness does for others.
Lord, I pray that I don't come across judgemental towards others, but loving. Let me not care what others think of me, if they think I am a fruitcake, let if be a fruitcake for you.
So take me as you find me, all my fears and failures, fill my life again. I give my life to follow, everything I believe in, now I surrender...
Summer time
This summer I want it to be low key and restful. So I will start with this bible verse:
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10
Lisa and Mrs. Fincke, her third grade teacher.
Mrs. Fincke was such a blessing to Lisa this year and is a great teacher who loves the Lord. My third grade teacher (Mrs Davis, who still happens to teach at Concordia) was my favorite teacher in elementary. Third grade is a tough year, compared to 1st and 2nd grade. This was Lisa's first year at Concordia and Mrs Fincke just really "got" Lisa and helped her this year.
Katie and Mrs Boriack, her second grade teacher. Mrs. Boriack is also a great teacher and has been a sweet blessing to Katie. One time in church Mrs Boriack was up front in the choir and Katie saw her and told EVERY person around us "That is my teacher, Mrs Boriack." When I told her that story, she said "thanks, Katie" The way she said it was priceless.
Katie got "hurt" at a soccer game and Lisa rushed to her aid.
Daddy and Lisa at our first swim meet. We learned so much about race numbers, heats and lanes. Also to bring chairs and snacks. Also that a swim meet lasts upwards of 4 hours and there is A LOT of down time. Also to bring a book, phones with cool apps and your patience.
Mom and her little swimmer. I just love the swim cap and goggles!
Look at that form. She is working on learning to dive from the dive block.
Great job! So far she competes in the freestyle, backstroke and 2 relays.
I am hoping that we can have a restful summer. I think when June is over we will. We have swim meet practice every day from 3:45 to 4:30. Swim meets are on Mondays from 4:45 until 9pm. My last day of Griefshare is this Thursday and I think I am ready to have our evenings open.
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10
Lisa and Mrs. Fincke, her third grade teacher.
Mrs. Fincke was such a blessing to Lisa this year and is a great teacher who loves the Lord. My third grade teacher (Mrs Davis, who still happens to teach at Concordia) was my favorite teacher in elementary. Third grade is a tough year, compared to 1st and 2nd grade. This was Lisa's first year at Concordia and Mrs Fincke just really "got" Lisa and helped her this year.
Katie and Mrs Boriack, her second grade teacher. Mrs. Boriack is also a great teacher and has been a sweet blessing to Katie. One time in church Mrs Boriack was up front in the choir and Katie saw her and told EVERY person around us "That is my teacher, Mrs Boriack." When I told her that story, she said "thanks, Katie" The way she said it was priceless.
Katie got "hurt" at a soccer game and Lisa rushed to her aid.
Daddy and Lisa at our first swim meet. We learned so much about race numbers, heats and lanes. Also to bring chairs and snacks. Also that a swim meet lasts upwards of 4 hours and there is A LOT of down time. Also to bring a book, phones with cool apps and your patience.
Mom and her little swimmer. I just love the swim cap and goggles!
Look at that form. She is working on learning to dive from the dive block.
Great job! So far she competes in the freestyle, backstroke and 2 relays.
I am hoping that we can have a restful summer. I think when June is over we will. We have swim meet practice every day from 3:45 to 4:30. Swim meets are on Mondays from 4:45 until 9pm. My last day of Griefshare is this Thursday and I think I am ready to have our evenings open.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Random Highlights
-Lisa is on the swim team at the JCC. The Stingrays. She is a good little swimmer. She is learning alot, especially the diving into the pool part. The first time they were diving into the pool she told her coach "Coach, I am a swimmer, not a diver." I thought that was hilarious, like the coach was going to say "Oh, OK". But he is working with her, and we are not talking high platform dives here, no, it is basically the platform 12 inches from the water. Her first swim meet will be in 2 weeks.
-Katie played soccer for the YMCA. Her team was "The Crushers". So far they have won 2 games. One more to go for the season. I don't know if she will do it next year. She really wants to play volleyball. The girls look so cute running out there. Now there really are some parents who take this very serious. Their girls have been playing soccer since they could walk. We told Katie to have fun, to do her best and to be a team player. She is not really a runner, so when she would come by us we would say "run like the wind, bulls eye" (from Toy Story).
-In BSF we finished the study of John. It was very good. We all learned so much about the earthly ministry of Jesus, His death and resurrection. Next year is Isaiah. I hear that it will be challenging.
-Lisa is moving up to 4th grade. She is turning 10 this Friday (the last day of school). How exciting. We have some special surprises planned for our baby.
10 years old. I cannot believe how fast time has gone. We really do not have a lot of time to prepare her for the world. To make sure she is equipped. I have been praying so much for God to touch her heart so she wants nothing more than to live for Him, to glorify Him in all she does. This world is a scary place and I will have to leave it at that for right now--trust in God, trust in God, trust in God.
-Katie is moving up to the third grade. She is a natural student. Except for this past week--I think she checked out of school already. Thankfully she has done really well this year so she had some room for an off week. Too bad it was the last week of school:-(
-Katie played soccer for the YMCA. Her team was "The Crushers". So far they have won 2 games. One more to go for the season. I don't know if she will do it next year. She really wants to play volleyball. The girls look so cute running out there. Now there really are some parents who take this very serious. Their girls have been playing soccer since they could walk. We told Katie to have fun, to do her best and to be a team player. She is not really a runner, so when she would come by us we would say "run like the wind, bulls eye" (from Toy Story).
-In BSF we finished the study of John. It was very good. We all learned so much about the earthly ministry of Jesus, His death and resurrection. Next year is Isaiah. I hear that it will be challenging.
-Lisa is moving up to 4th grade. She is turning 10 this Friday (the last day of school). How exciting. We have some special surprises planned for our baby.
10 years old. I cannot believe how fast time has gone. We really do not have a lot of time to prepare her for the world. To make sure she is equipped. I have been praying so much for God to touch her heart so she wants nothing more than to live for Him, to glorify Him in all she does. This world is a scary place and I will have to leave it at that for right now--trust in God, trust in God, trust in God.
-Katie is moving up to the third grade. She is a natural student. Except for this past week--I think she checked out of school already. Thankfully she has done really well this year so she had some room for an off week. Too bad it was the last week of school:-(
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Learning and Serving
I started as a hospice RN in April, unsure of what I am doing, but feeling led by God to do this. I NEVER had any aspirations, goals, dreams or desire to be a hospice nurse. In fact, I was on the other end of the spectrum "stay away from the light..." I was an ER nurse. But my thinking has totally changed.
I have 11 patients that I case manage. I find myself thinking about death alot now. The Bible says that we are eternally minded. Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has also set eternity in the hearts of men.
Do my patients know Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior?
That is the only question that will matter when we die.
Mike and I attended a training class taught by a wonderful pastor friend who helped us in our darkest hour. It is missional worker training and basically teaches that we are all missionaries. We have "our people" that we have relationships with who we influence with the love of Jesus. Our family, neighbors, co-workers, patients.
We were asked "Why Jesus?"
Because He saved me. He changed me. He chose me. He loves me. He died for me, so I should live for Him.
What are ways we bring the presence of Jesus to people?
By listening. Being interested in their lives. We must develop a spirit of quietness and listening. Don't try to change and be judgemental. God is the judge. Don't try to "fix" them. Let God be God. I am just the vessel and instrument to show the love of Christ.
Two weekends ago was the spring Women's STARS retreat. It was also my first Mother's Day without my mom. I didn't think that would bother me, but one of my patients who I met on the day before the retreat, has my mom's same diagnosis and looks like my mom did. I went home and cried--really hard. It was therapeutic. Mike and I got to talk and pray, it was a beautiful time.
I gave my testimony (reconciliation), gave an introduction for Laura and for Melody. I got the honor to be a co-table leader again. I was the nurse and spent the first night in the ER with Vickie who has 5 fractures in her foot after an accident on the very first event of the retreat. This was by far the hardest retreat I have ever been on. On many levels there was spiritual warfare happening. Total exhaustion, giving my testimony, being the nurse and having a prayer partner who did not want to be there, was extremely negative and especially harsh in her word choices to me. It was fun being with Vickie in the infirmary all weekend, but I did not feel like I was part of the team. As a bonus, I got to come home to my youngest child with a case of lice. Good times!! Late nights!! Fine tooth combs and lots of laundry!!
But all is good and I really have managed to laugh at this stuff. God is good.
I loved serving on team. I have made some incredible friends and am extremely blessed by the women God has put in my life.
God reminded me when I was about to give my testimony that my history is His Story. He saved Mike. He saved me. He saved our marriage. I wish my past was perfect and that I followed Him my entire life. But in my story, I found His mercies, His grace and His forgiveness. I found His love. He never lost me--He was always there.
I have 11 patients that I case manage. I find myself thinking about death alot now. The Bible says that we are eternally minded. Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has also set eternity in the hearts of men.
Do my patients know Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior?
That is the only question that will matter when we die.
Mike and I attended a training class taught by a wonderful pastor friend who helped us in our darkest hour. It is missional worker training and basically teaches that we are all missionaries. We have "our people" that we have relationships with who we influence with the love of Jesus. Our family, neighbors, co-workers, patients.
We were asked "Why Jesus?"
Because He saved me. He changed me. He chose me. He loves me. He died for me, so I should live for Him.
What are ways we bring the presence of Jesus to people?
By listening. Being interested in their lives. We must develop a spirit of quietness and listening. Don't try to change and be judgemental. God is the judge. Don't try to "fix" them. Let God be God. I am just the vessel and instrument to show the love of Christ.
Two weekends ago was the spring Women's STARS retreat. It was also my first Mother's Day without my mom. I didn't think that would bother me, but one of my patients who I met on the day before the retreat, has my mom's same diagnosis and looks like my mom did. I went home and cried--really hard. It was therapeutic. Mike and I got to talk and pray, it was a beautiful time.
I gave my testimony (reconciliation), gave an introduction for Laura and for Melody. I got the honor to be a co-table leader again. I was the nurse and spent the first night in the ER with Vickie who has 5 fractures in her foot after an accident on the very first event of the retreat. This was by far the hardest retreat I have ever been on. On many levels there was spiritual warfare happening. Total exhaustion, giving my testimony, being the nurse and having a prayer partner who did not want to be there, was extremely negative and especially harsh in her word choices to me. It was fun being with Vickie in the infirmary all weekend, but I did not feel like I was part of the team. As a bonus, I got to come home to my youngest child with a case of lice. Good times!! Late nights!! Fine tooth combs and lots of laundry!!
But all is good and I really have managed to laugh at this stuff. God is good.
I loved serving on team. I have made some incredible friends and am extremely blessed by the women God has put in my life.
God reminded me when I was about to give my testimony that my history is His Story. He saved Mike. He saved me. He saved our marriage. I wish my past was perfect and that I followed Him my entire life. But in my story, I found His mercies, His grace and His forgiveness. I found His love. He never lost me--He was always there.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Spring time fun
Life has sure been busy around here. The last leg of the school year, new job with hospice, BSF, Katie's soccer, Lisa's art, Griefshare, STARS retreat team (I am giving my testimony and will be a table leader and the nurse.) There will be so much to share in the near future about my job and the retreat, but for now here is a short recap of what we've been up to.
We had a long weekend at the coast last weekend. It was nice to get away.
We were able to bring the kayak again and this time actually get it off the top of the suburban. The last time it was so windy that we could not even take the thing down. Speaking of wind, I went for a run on the beach and headed off, it was so...easy, relaxing, even fun. But then, I turned around to come back to our spot and it was...hard, not relaxing, and fun had escaped my mind. It was a work-out.
The girls were VERY excited to give this kayaking a shot.
Lisa and Katie were not happy with the tipping of the kayak. It scared them and neither one of them have the desire to kayak again. At least for this trip. They seem to have short term memories on some things. At least they weren't out too deep and they had their life jackets on and their daddy was right there to help them out:-)
On Saturday I got to go to the Beth Moore Simulcast "So Long Insecurity." It was a great simulcast that I attended in Rockport. It was based on Ephesians 4: 17-24:
So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off you old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to like God in true righteousness and holiness.
We had a long weekend at the coast last weekend. It was nice to get away.
We were able to bring the kayak again and this time actually get it off the top of the suburban. The last time it was so windy that we could not even take the thing down. Speaking of wind, I went for a run on the beach and headed off, it was so...easy, relaxing, even fun. But then, I turned around to come back to our spot and it was...hard, not relaxing, and fun had escaped my mind. It was a work-out.
The girls were VERY excited to give this kayaking a shot.
There they go. Fun times ready to be had by all.
Oh no! What happened to the fun times?
Lisa and Katie were not happy with the tipping of the kayak. It scared them and neither one of them have the desire to kayak again. At least for this trip. They seem to have short term memories on some things. At least they weren't out too deep and they had their life jackets on and their daddy was right there to help them out:-)
On Saturday I got to go to the Beth Moore Simulcast "So Long Insecurity." It was a great simulcast that I attended in Rockport. It was based on Ephesians 4: 17-24:
So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off you old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to like God in true righteousness and holiness.
6 statements that describe a secure woman based on Ephesians 4.
A secure woman is:
S-saved from herself (insecurity is idolatrous self interest; God's security takes us out of ourselves, security makes us think less often of ourselves)
E-entitled to truth (deceitful desires: if I could just have this, achieve this, be this...then I would be secure, perfectionism is an insecurity at an art form) Eph 4:21
C-clothed with intention (Be intentional, we will not walk in security accidentally, Prov 31:25 She is clothed with strength and dignity)
U-upended by grace ( grace them as Christ Jesus has graced me; people who believe they are deeply graced deeply grace others)
R-rebounded by love (Jesus loves me THIS I KNOW, we are loved, live like a dearly loved child)
E-exceptional in life--this one was my favorite. Let Christ overtake me so I will be secure in my relationships, work life, church life, social life--then I will stick out like a healthy thumb and people will want to know what my hope is.
Some example were: everyone is out for her own...except her
no one can handle that...except her
no one can handle that...except her
nobody was nice...except her
nobody handles aging well...except her
threatened by other women....except her
Be the exception. What is it about you? Jesus
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Overwhelmed and Inadequate (how's that for a catchy title)
Time is just going by so fast and I sit for a moment and think that if I would have done this or that I would be done by now. If I got organized, really organized, that I would not feel so overwhelmed so much of the time.
The past few weeks I have been in a state of insecurity like I haven't been in for a while. I question every single decision I am making--little ones like what to make for dinner to big ones like did I make the right decision to leave my job at Baptist. There is so much unknown and I wish that God would just say audibly--"this is what I want you to do."
I am feeling insecure as a mom. The girls are getting so big and I don't want them to have the same issues I did. I want to have a relationship with them that I didn't get to have with my mom. I want them to love God with every fiber of their being and to find husbands that love God with every fiber of their being. It is scary to see the world they are growing up in and it is making me feel like if we don't prepare them for what is out there, they will follow the crowd.
It feels like all I do is discipline. Or keep on them for everything like brushing teeth and picking up behind themselves. I try to have light, fun conversations with them but then they start to pick on each other and before I know it--the moment is over and discipline is required. Takes all of the fun out of it.
Mike and I had a difficult week. We are good now, but it just reminds me that we are both flawed human beings expecting the other one not to be flawed. Communication is so vital to a marriage, that it is almost hilarious that men and women communicate so differently. Being humble and holding ones tongue is also so vital. Of course, sometimes the humility comes only after you didn't hold your tongue:-)
Even though I am going through this...valley of sorts, I will not stay here. I will learn what I need to learn, apply it and move on.
I am incredibly thankful for this Holy Week. Jesus took all of my sins and flaws upon Himself and paid the price so that I can live eternally in His presence. How do I give thanks? I can't in my own strength. But I can go on to live a life of thanks and to remain in His Spirit. To let the Holy Spirit have control at all times, especially in the most difficult of times--like marriage and parenting-which I am learning is not for the faint of heart--and they both bring out every single insecurity that plagues me. I am extremely grateful for where God has placed me, the people He has given me to love, nurture, pray for and yes, discipline when needed.
Lord, deliver me from these feelings of being inadequate and insecure. You have not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. Be my strength in weakness. Give me the power to trust You in all areas.
In Jesus' saving name, amen
The past few weeks I have been in a state of insecurity like I haven't been in for a while. I question every single decision I am making--little ones like what to make for dinner to big ones like did I make the right decision to leave my job at Baptist. There is so much unknown and I wish that God would just say audibly--"this is what I want you to do."
I am feeling insecure as a mom. The girls are getting so big and I don't want them to have the same issues I did. I want to have a relationship with them that I didn't get to have with my mom. I want them to love God with every fiber of their being and to find husbands that love God with every fiber of their being. It is scary to see the world they are growing up in and it is making me feel like if we don't prepare them for what is out there, they will follow the crowd.
It feels like all I do is discipline. Or keep on them for everything like brushing teeth and picking up behind themselves. I try to have light, fun conversations with them but then they start to pick on each other and before I know it--the moment is over and discipline is required. Takes all of the fun out of it.
Mike and I had a difficult week. We are good now, but it just reminds me that we are both flawed human beings expecting the other one not to be flawed. Communication is so vital to a marriage, that it is almost hilarious that men and women communicate so differently. Being humble and holding ones tongue is also so vital. Of course, sometimes the humility comes only after you didn't hold your tongue:-)
Even though I am going through this...valley of sorts, I will not stay here. I will learn what I need to learn, apply it and move on.
I am incredibly thankful for this Holy Week. Jesus took all of my sins and flaws upon Himself and paid the price so that I can live eternally in His presence. How do I give thanks? I can't in my own strength. But I can go on to live a life of thanks and to remain in His Spirit. To let the Holy Spirit have control at all times, especially in the most difficult of times--like marriage and parenting-which I am learning is not for the faint of heart--and they both bring out every single insecurity that plagues me. I am extremely grateful for where God has placed me, the people He has given me to love, nurture, pray for and yes, discipline when needed.
Lord, deliver me from these feelings of being inadequate and insecure. You have not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. Be my strength in weakness. Give me the power to trust You in all areas.
In Jesus' saving name, amen
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Spring Break and Life Decisions
This is spring break week and this is what we have done:
1.) Lots of yard work--Mike took the leaf blower and blew the trillion leaves into piles and the girls and I took them via garbage cans to the back and we have a huge pile that we will take out every Tuesday and Thursday until the pile is gone--which I am guessing will be around 2011.
2.) We are being entertained by Katie's three class mice: Mrs. Jumpy, Spot, Speedy. Katie's teacher sent out an e-mail asking for volunteer's to watch the mice over spring break. Mike and I thought it would be fun for the girls, but I also thought there would be a lot of volunteers. Wrong. Not even one--except us. So as I am carrying the aquarium with the three "homeless for spring break" mice out to the car, Katie's friends and classmates were saying "Katie, you are so lucky!!" as their parents were smiling and I'm sure thinking "glad it's you and not me." I clarified what the liability of the life of the mice was before we agreed to bring them home to two excited girls and two cats. We have no worries:-)
3.) Dentist appointment. All is good for another 6 months.
4.) Cleaning out closets, washing windows, getting oil changed in truck, trying to be domesticated I suppose.
5.) Deciding what my next job in life is going to be. Last Friday was my last day as a quality coordinator. I am hired by Mike's company to work home health and there is a hospice company that I am interested in. My heart is really leaning toward hospice. Our experience with mom was so beautiful and I felt so close to the Lord during that time. I know that I can do hospice. I am just not sure the time is right now. Cindy and I are in week 3 of Griefshare and it is very good. We have had two friends in the last week ask about our experience with hospice. One of our friends, her mom was in hospice for 1 1/2 days before going home to be with the Lord. The other just went home on hospice yesterday. I love to talk about it and to talk about God and how He gave us Psalm 116 at that time.
6.) Having fun with the girls. We did manicures today. It has been fun to stay around home and do things with the stuff we already have.
Isaiah 30:21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way, walk in it."
1.) Lots of yard work--Mike took the leaf blower and blew the trillion leaves into piles and the girls and I took them via garbage cans to the back and we have a huge pile that we will take out every Tuesday and Thursday until the pile is gone--which I am guessing will be around 2011.
2.) We are being entertained by Katie's three class mice: Mrs. Jumpy, Spot, Speedy. Katie's teacher sent out an e-mail asking for volunteer's to watch the mice over spring break. Mike and I thought it would be fun for the girls, but I also thought there would be a lot of volunteers. Wrong. Not even one--except us. So as I am carrying the aquarium with the three "homeless for spring break" mice out to the car, Katie's friends and classmates were saying "Katie, you are so lucky!!" as their parents were smiling and I'm sure thinking "glad it's you and not me." I clarified what the liability of the life of the mice was before we agreed to bring them home to two excited girls and two cats. We have no worries:-)
3.) Dentist appointment. All is good for another 6 months.
4.) Cleaning out closets, washing windows, getting oil changed in truck, trying to be domesticated I suppose.
5.) Deciding what my next job in life is going to be. Last Friday was my last day as a quality coordinator. I am hired by Mike's company to work home health and there is a hospice company that I am interested in. My heart is really leaning toward hospice. Our experience with mom was so beautiful and I felt so close to the Lord during that time. I know that I can do hospice. I am just not sure the time is right now. Cindy and I are in week 3 of Griefshare and it is very good. We have had two friends in the last week ask about our experience with hospice. One of our friends, her mom was in hospice for 1 1/2 days before going home to be with the Lord. The other just went home on hospice yesterday. I love to talk about it and to talk about God and how He gave us Psalm 116 at that time.
6.) Having fun with the girls. We did manicures today. It has been fun to stay around home and do things with the stuff we already have.
Isaiah 30:21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way, walk in it."
Sunday, February 28, 2010
So Long February
I can't believe that February 2010 is over.
I turned 38 on the 15th. It was not a big deal. Birthdays have not been a big deal to me. I didn't think that it would be hard since mom died, but it turned out to be a little more difficult than I anticipated. I grieved her loss. The loss of the woman who brought me into the world, nourished me, taught me, disciplined me, loved me. I rejoiced over knowing without a doubt where she is and that one day we will be reunited.
I had some surgery to help with some female issues I had been having. I was nervous about it, but it all went rather smooth and I think that the results will be well worth it.
Mike bought me Beth Moore's book So Long Insecurity, you've been a bad friend to us.
It was really good although I don't want to say I read a good book and that's where it ends. I am working on change. On not being insecure.
My insecurities at this time in my life are fear of looking/sounding stupid or foolish or dumb, self-doubt, and being too sensitive. I need restoration. I am praying for God to do make me into what He meant me to be. He did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. I am asking Him to help me take responsibility for the insecurity that I have caused myself like pride, selfishness, even thinking too little of myself which is a form of pride. I ask Him to convict me instantly when insecurity is of my own making. I ask Him to flood my life with purpose and and compassion, for Him to be my strength in weakness.
My last day at my current job is March 12. I am excited to start something different, a new challenge, and to only work part-time. I cannot wait to be a little more involved in school and Women's Bible Study, to be able to be home a little bit more, to get involved more with the girls school life. I am a little nervous for only 1 1/2 incomes instead of the 2 full time incomes, but Mike has been a great financial leader in our home and we should be able to do this without difficulty. Thank you Lord.
The Lord will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whos waters never fail. Isaiah 58:11
I turned 38 on the 15th. It was not a big deal. Birthdays have not been a big deal to me. I didn't think that it would be hard since mom died, but it turned out to be a little more difficult than I anticipated. I grieved her loss. The loss of the woman who brought me into the world, nourished me, taught me, disciplined me, loved me. I rejoiced over knowing without a doubt where she is and that one day we will be reunited.
I had some surgery to help with some female issues I had been having. I was nervous about it, but it all went rather smooth and I think that the results will be well worth it.
Mike bought me Beth Moore's book So Long Insecurity, you've been a bad friend to us.
It was really good although I don't want to say I read a good book and that's where it ends. I am working on change. On not being insecure.
My insecurities at this time in my life are fear of looking/sounding stupid or foolish or dumb, self-doubt, and being too sensitive. I need restoration. I am praying for God to do make me into what He meant me to be. He did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. I am asking Him to help me take responsibility for the insecurity that I have caused myself like pride, selfishness, even thinking too little of myself which is a form of pride. I ask Him to convict me instantly when insecurity is of my own making. I ask Him to flood my life with purpose and and compassion, for Him to be my strength in weakness.
My last day at my current job is March 12. I am excited to start something different, a new challenge, and to only work part-time. I cannot wait to be a little more involved in school and Women's Bible Study, to be able to be home a little bit more, to get involved more with the girls school life. I am a little nervous for only 1 1/2 incomes instead of the 2 full time incomes, but Mike has been a great financial leader in our home and we should be able to do this without difficulty. Thank you Lord.
The Lord will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whos waters never fail. Isaiah 58:11
Monday, February 1, 2010
Weekend recap
This past weekend Mike and I got to go up to Waco to the World Mandate. It was held on the campus of Baylor University and there were about 3000 people in attendance. The theme was "Let Your Kingdom Come."
It is about the idea of God's presence, about serving, missionary work, being not just the "head" of Jesus, but being his hands and feet. It was about what breaks God's heart--the pain in this world--orphans, famine, addiction, any dark place.
There was great worship music, lots of prayer and missionaries did some teaching.
Highlights of the messages:
-Go to the places of pain where people are, in their addiction, difficulties of life, the dark places. Those are the places where God is and He wants to show mercy and grace. God is at work in the pain, He wants to heal and restore. He does that in our lives and we are to take that and help others out in their pain.
-This life is not about all that we can gather, rather it should be about what we can give away.
-God is looking for obedient people. We are not His disciples if we are not obeying.
We headed back on Sunday morning and made it back to church in time for our service. I couldn't believe that our sermon was about serving. Actually, I guess that I can believe that. God likes to do things like that, to make sure we are getting the message.
What I got from our sermon was about the attitude in serving. Giving it your all with a joyful spirit.
A Bible verse from World Mandate that stood out to me was James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
It is about the idea of God's presence, about serving, missionary work, being not just the "head" of Jesus, but being his hands and feet. It was about what breaks God's heart--the pain in this world--orphans, famine, addiction, any dark place.
There was great worship music, lots of prayer and missionaries did some teaching.
Highlights of the messages:
-Go to the places of pain where people are, in their addiction, difficulties of life, the dark places. Those are the places where God is and He wants to show mercy and grace. God is at work in the pain, He wants to heal and restore. He does that in our lives and we are to take that and help others out in their pain.
-This life is not about all that we can gather, rather it should be about what we can give away.
-God is looking for obedient people. We are not His disciples if we are not obeying.
We headed back on Sunday morning and made it back to church in time for our service. I couldn't believe that our sermon was about serving. Actually, I guess that I can believe that. God likes to do things like that, to make sure we are getting the message.
What I got from our sermon was about the attitude in serving. Giving it your all with a joyful spirit.
A Bible verse from World Mandate that stood out to me was James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
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