Mom December 19, 1948-November 7, 2009

Mom died on November 7 at 1015 in the morning at Odyssey Hospice. Cindy got the honor to be there when she opened her eyes, smiled and took her last breath. That smile remained on her face and it was a gift from God. I know Who she was smiling at, and I know He was smiling back at her, with His arms wide open welcoming His precious daughter home.

I find myself thinking of mom often. I think "I wonder what she is doing in heaven right now." I find myself wanting to be there too, not in the "end my life now" sense, but the "I can't wait to go" sense.

I find myself crying at the craziest things. Tonight I had to throw away some of the flowers from her service and it made me so sad. It was a reminder that life does go on, of course having 2 little girls and a husband and a job and everything else is a reminder also. But I want to slow down. I want to tell God that I love my mom and would He please make sure that she knows that.

Here is my eulogy that I read at mom's memorial service.

So much has happened the last few years, but as I stand here now, it seems so fleeting. As James 4: 14 says “What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”

What was my mom’s life? She did not have the best childhood, in fact, I dare say it was a childhood I would not wish on anybody. Yet by the grace of God, she married, had two girls and made sure we went to church and Sunday School every Sunday. She loved the Lord. That is what I want to take away from her life.

Some things that mom loved in her life:
Horses and books on horses
Drawing and books on drawing
Cooking and books on cooking
Do it yourself and books about doing it yourself
God and many, many books on God by many, many different authors
She loved to read and now all of her books are in my garage. Cindy and I are going to have to organize all of her books with a card catalogue and the Dewey Decimal System.

Many of you will remember mom rocking on her rocking chair in her wrangler jeans, plaid shirt, vest, boots and baseball cap. Obviously Cindy and I didn’t inherit her sense of style. But she was very content with what she had.


At the end, all she wanted to do was to go to church. She loved to talk with Mike about the Lord. She basically was a captive audience for him, so he could talk as long as he wanted about God, his favorite subject.

I just wanted to share some personal thoughts written at my mom’s bedside.
This is taken from my journal and it sums up my thoughts about my mom:

This morning is beautiful. Cindy made her peace with mom last night. I feel at peace. Regrets I have are not taking more pictures of mom the last couple of years. I regret not being more patient in my thoughts when mom would repeat herself or could not remember how to get to the bathroom. However, I am far more thankful than regretful. I am thankful that Cindy and I got the opportunity to take care of mom the last few years. I am thankful to know her wishes for the end of her life. Psalm 116:7 “Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.” When mom died, she opened her eyes and smiled. No doubt Who she was smiling at. Psalm 116:15 “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints”

Thank you mom for raising us to love the Lord. You planted the seed, and it took. I love the Lord with all of my heart. I will see you again without a doubt.

I am sorry this disease took your mental capacities. I am sorry that you don’t get to see your grandchildren grow up. But know that Mike and I are raising Lisa and Katie to love the Lord and to serve Him. Please know that Cindy and I are closer now than we have ever been. She is on the road in her walk with Christ and Mike and I will be on that road with her. You are at peace. A peace that passes all understanding, but one day we will understand. And we will all rejoice together with Jesus Christ.

As the Apostle Paul said in
Philipians 1:21 “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.”

It was a beautiful service. Many of the ladies from Concordia and the STARS retreat surprised us and came and sang a beautiful song "Daughter's Praise." Pastor Zach gave a wonderful message that preached the gospel, something that mom would have wanted. We had a nice little reception here at the house and now it is time to grieve and be joyful. Mom truly is in a far better place.