Authenticity

I am reading a light devotional that I think will allow me to journal here on the blog.  It is by Jen Hatmaker and the title is Out of the Spin Cycle.  I recently read her book Seven: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess and it has changed my thinking in so many areas. 

I ran across this devotional and bought it for one of my good friends Jenni.  I read some of it before I gave it to her and thought how fun this would be to do with her.  She has 6 year old twins and a 2 year old firecracker.  Her husband is really good friends with Mike and they are so fun to hang out with.  I have been learning lately how important it is to surround myself with girlfriends who have the same values that I do.  God has definitely blessed me with some really neat ladies in my life. 

There is a marriage crisis going on in friends life-- this couple used to be in our marriage small group and I reached out to her and she basically said no thanks.  Which is fine, but she is saying "no thanks" to all of the people in her life who are giving her biblical advice (pastors, counselor).  She wants to throw her marriage down the drain for selfish reasons.  She is surrounding herself with people who tell her she should live for herself.  She is not thinking of her three young children.  It is breaking mine and Mike's heart.  This friend is pretty close to Jenni and Jenni has been seeking my counsel as she gently maneuvers this situation.

Which finally brings me to getting this devotional--to not shut ourselves off from the godly friends in our lives.  To walk this walk together.  We need each other.  Not to take the place of our spouses, but to grow and laugh and live life together as women who want to be godly wives and mothers and friends.
I was so happy to find this devotional that made me laugh.  It is so real.

Day 1:  I'm Perfect and My Kids Never Fight 

 Matthew 23:5-7

 5“Everything they do is done for people to see: They make their phylacteries wide and the tassels on their garments long; 6 they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues; 7 they love to be greeted with respect in the marketplaces and to be called ‘Rabbi’ by others.

Jen writes:  When we operate from the central concern of being seen a certain way, we can't develop healthy relationships in the messy soil of reality--the only place they'll grow.  Presenting a perfect, fake life to others generates fear in our own hearts and intimidation in everyone else's, and creates nice, fake relationships--with our friends, with our family members, even with our own children.  pg 15


Authenticity.  Transparency.  It is vital in our relationships.  The friend whose marriage is falling apart has everything the world sees as success.  She is a doctor, has a beautiful home, 3 healthy children, has a nanny and maid, is involved in MOPS, her husband is involved at church and wants their marriage to work.  She had this front for all of us to see but says she has been unhappy for two years.  It was all about appearances to her.  Her life was falling apart, but she gave the appearance that she had it all together.  I pray for her to be fulfilled by the One who is meant to fill the void she is filling with worldly values, for her heart to soften towards her husband and Jesus.  I also pray for us to be authentic, truthful, transparent, real, to be the same person on the outside that we are on the inside.  To allow Jesus to redeem and transform us.

Jen's questions from the devotional:

Do you have a struggle, doubt, temptation, or crisis no one knows about--big or small?
What is the primary reason you haven't told anyone?

   Mike knows what I struggle with.  As do a couple of my closest friends.  Insecurity.  I am a people pleaser at heart.  I get my feelings hurt easy.  Working on it, working on it!!